Free at last
I’ve been involved with the criminal-legal system since I was 11 years old, and at the age of 24, I am finally free. Freedom feels good. I don’t have to think about whether I am going to be locked up for missing a court appearance or be harassed by the police for hanging out in my old neighborhood. I’ve had so much trouble dealing with police in the past, that even coming home to see family and friends had been a source of stress and anxiety.
The very system that was supposed to protect me, failed me in a way I can’t ever forget. I was promised rehabilitation and services, but all I was given was pain, confusion and loneliness. I remember sitting in a cell most of the day, no access to trade programs, barely any high school, and no college options. I feel like I missed out on so many things that could’ve better prepared me for where I want to be in life. It just never made any sense to me. What is the point of taking someone away from their family?
Despite the grief and pain the juvenile justice system has caused me, in some ways I am thankful for the experience it gave me. I used to always sit in my cell and think of how things could be different. How things needed to be fair. How we shouldn’t be sitting around doing nothing. I started to think of a plan for myself. I wanted to fight to abolish the system that was created to lock up children and separate them from their family. I found my passion in juvenile justice advocacy.
I am now able to work and teach life skills. I am able to help people going through the same situation. People that are feeling lonely, depressed, sad, angry, and confused. Although I am physically free, I don’t know that I’ll ever be mentally free as long as there is a justice system that continues to hurt and ruin young people's lives. I have to get up every day and continue to fight for the youth who are not getting treated fairly. The youth who aren't getting the services they may need. Youth who are silenced. I never would have imagined that I would be in a place where I am now, advocating for youth justice, but my experiences and my freedom have allowed me to continue the fight.
by Ja’Vaune Jackson
